communication in marriage

On average, couples tend to wait around 6 years before they seek out help with their marriages. That’s 6 long years of discontent. During that time, problems fester and grow until they feel insurmountable.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Communication in marriage isn’t a hidden secret. With extra effort and help from PACT therapy, you’ll find that your communication gets better at a rapid pace.

Uncertain how to begin this new journey of better communication? Keep reading! I’ll go through several tips to help get you started.

1. Start and End Every Day With Each Other

We all have busy lives filled with different stresses and obligations. That’s why it’s extra important to set aside a specific time to spend with the person you love.

While you’ll often spend plenty of time with one another throughout the day, always make a specific effort in the morning and night. By following PACT therapy, you’ll incorporate this practice in your life.

Waking up and falling asleep with each other is one of the best feelings in the world. It’s comforting and safe and gives you a chance to indulge in how you’re feeling or talk about problems. Use this time to speak to one another about anything and everything you don’t have time to say during your busy days.

It reaffirms your closeness to fall asleep and wake up next to each other every day. This connection helps communication between you grow every day.

2. Wait For the Correct Timing

Tackling your problems as soon as possible is another part of PACT therapy. You never want personal injuries to have time to fester into something monstrous.

Even with the need to correct these problems without delay, there’s a time and place for certain conversations.

If you’re both trying to get to work, it’s not a good time to have a serious conversation. Instead of rushing through the problem, tell your partner you wish to talk the next time you’re both free. This way, you’re setting aside a proper time where you both can give the problem the attention it deserves.

Whenever either of you needs time to talk, make sure you agree on a time that works for both of you. Be mindful that you’re not trying to avoid the conversation with this method.

3. Look For Non-Verbal Clues

Good communication doesn’t always mean speaking and listening. Watching is another important part of learning how to communicate with your partner.

There are certain non-verbal clues we, as humans, notice even when we don’t realize it. The next step is to actively look for these clues so that we can understand our partner’s feelings.

PACT therapy teaches that protecting your partner is one of the best ways to improve your marriage. This includes both private and public places.

By watching your partner, you learn more about them. You’ll know the exact moment they’re uncomfortable or insecure. You’ll know that it’s time to step in to help out when your partner struggles in a certain situation.

This shows your partner that you’re looking out for them. It also gives them a sense of security that simple words don’t always convey.

4. Drop All Assumptions

By assuming that you know everything your partner will say or think, you stop listening. But listening is a vital part of improving your marriage communication skills.

PACT therapy focuses on teaching you how to stop making assumptions that harm both you and your partner. These assumptions are not an easy thing to stop. It’s a learned skill we have to practice to perfect.

The extra effort of clearing your mind of all assumptions lets you get into any conversation with an openness and a willingness to listen. That alone makes a huge difference in any conversation.

5. Never Use Insults

This is a tip that’s often hard to remember when things get heated in an argument. Insults have no place in a relationship. Instead, there should be mutual understanding and security for both people.

The use of insults damages this sense of security. It makes both parties feel like they need to go on the defensive. It only escalates the situation until it blows up into something uncontrollable.

Always think about what you’re saying before you say it. Taking an extra second or two helps stop you from saying harmful words that you don’t mean.

6. Remember to Think about the Other Side

A marriage is a two-sided coin. You’ll never have one side without the other and it’s important to remember that. Even in the most heated of arguments, you and your partner need to remember the other side of the conversation.

PACT therapy helps with this kind of unspoken connection. You’ll learn to understand how your partner feels or what they mean without prejudices getting in the way.

Try to think about your partner’s point of view within every conversation. This practice opens up the door for better communication for both of you.

Also, remember to communicate your side for your partner so that they can listen in return.

7. Finish With Appreciation

No matter how big the argument or how serious the conversation, end each one with positivity. PACT therapy teaches you how to build a connected relationship full of trust and love. By finishing every argument with kindness, you’re strengthening your relationship.

Even showing simple gratitude for each other’s willingness to listen is enough to build a stronger bond.

No matter how you show your appreciation and love of one another, make sure to put in the effort. A few simple but sincere words make a huge difference.

Communication in Marriage Starts With a Desire to Improve

All of the tips and PACT therapy in the world won’t help any communication in marriage unless there’s a desire to change.

Improving your communication with one another is the best start you can have. But it’ll continue to take work to follow through with the new changes in your life. With the desire to get better together, as a team, anything is possible.

If you’re looking for more information about PACT therapy, please feel free to contact me. I’ll help you every step of the way.

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104 Church Lane, Suite 131,
Baltimore, MD 21208

rabinowitzcounseling@gmail.com
(410) 736-8118

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